


I can't think of anythin', anythin' but you

by MidnightDancer



Series: I can't think of anythin', anythin' but you [1]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Bipolar Disorder, M/M, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-06
Updated: 2015-06-06
Packaged: 2018-04-03 04:36:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4087120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidnightDancer/pseuds/MidnightDancer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of unfinished stories.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  <em>(Mostly drabbles. Everything in this collection was written between Shameless season 4 and season 5 and therefore doesn't line up with canon.)</em></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Gold Chain

**Author's Note:**

> The idea behind the first story came up after someone brought up that Mickey never got his gold chain back after the visit to Patrick Gallagher's and the question "what if Mickey missed it and wanted one again?" came up.

The event is getting closer every day and Ian still has no fucking idea what to get him. He knows Mickey will say he doesn’t need anything. That they have to save up so they can finally get their own place. The need to get out of the house that holds so many bad memories for them both – but Mickey especially – has become overwhelming. They’ve tried not to let it get to them, to fill it with happy memories instead but flashbacks kept flicking behind their closed eyes. Going back to his family home wasn’t an option because too many people lived there with Sheila, Sammi and Chuck having kind of moved in a few weeks ago. 

\-----

When it comes to giving Mickey his birthday gift Ian’s nervousness has reached new heights.

“I wasn’t really sure what to get you but then I found this…“ At that Ian pulls a crumpled page out of his jeans pocket and shoves it at Mickey who has to grab it fast so it doesn’t fall to the floor. 

Mickey looks down at the page in his hand, eyebrows inching up his face as he recognizes the catalogue it’s from. He can’t even begin to guess where and how Ian found it and why he’s showing it to him now.


	2. Undisclosed Desires

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something catches Ian's eye, something he wants but doesn't verbalize. Mickey notices.

They’re walking down the street when something catches Ian’s eye and he just stops walking, Mickey bumping into him at the sudden stop. “What’s going on man, why’d you stop?” Mickey’s annoyed because they have somewhere to be and don’t have time to waste standing around on the sidewalk. He looks at Ian who is staring intently at something, eyes huge. 

“Ian, come on. We gotta go.” Ian visibly shakes himself and looks at Mickey, a strained smile on his face. “Yeah… Yeah. Let’s go.” He grabs his arm and drags him away but Mickey manages a glance at the lamp post, eyebrows shooting up. _Oh, so that’s it._

The poster keeps popping up in his thoughts throughout the day and an idea forms in his head. He’s not all that into it but he remembers Ian’s face, the longing in his eyes, and he thinks he can do it for Ian and they both deserve a fucking break anyway. It’s still going to be there for a little while so he plans the outing which is a bitch to do because he has to keep their work schedules in mind and they’re so fucked up that finding a time to go isn’t easy but he manages eventually.

Mickey has planned it for Saturday and the closer the day gets the more excited he gets himself which makes him want to punch his own face for being such a girl about it. But he can’t help it, picturing the smile and delight on Ian’s face when he realizes what they’re going to do makes his heart beat so fast it feels like it’s going to punch out of his chest. 

Finally it’s time and Mickey has to bite his lips to stop the smile threatening to spill over his face. He doesn’t want to give anything away just yet. He flops down on the couch beside Ian, grabbing his thigh. “Get up. We gotta be somewhere.” Ian looks away from the TV, one eyebrow hitching up. “Where do we have to be? It’s Saturday. Laaaaaaaazy day.” Mickey tries not to roll his eyes. Trust Ian to fucking question everything. “Just get dressed. You’ll see.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What Ian saw was a poster for a fair, something I figured he never attended or if he did only as a very young child and that it represented an event of childish innocence and carefreeness to him, something he never really got to experience.


	3. Just wanted to be good for you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I may have gotten POVs a bit mixed up in this... please forgive me if I did. (Corrections are welcome.)

"Don't you fucking get it, you asshole? I fucking love you and I fucking told you and showed you before. What the fuck did you think it meant when I told you we're a couple and that... that you make me free. Jesus Christ, Ian. I'm trying here but you're not making it any easier."

"It wasn't supposed to go this way!" Ian yelled, his voice thick and eyes brimming with yet unshed tears. He was shaking like a leaf.

"I don't... what wasn't supposed to go this way? Come on, Ian, you need to talk to me. I can't read your fucking mind you know." Mickey sat down on their threadbare couch, sinking deep into it and looked up at Ian. He wasn't worried about Ian towering over him anymore. They were equals where it counted. He patted the empty space on the couch, gesturing to Ian to sit down.

Ian was still standing by the table, his hand wringing the life out of that damned table cloth, shivering. He was visibly upset, his lips quivering; the first tear slid down his cheek, the shame of it burning him like acid.

Mickey could see that Ian was beating himself up inside, berating himself, telling himself what a useless piece of shit he was. Mickey could see it in his darkening eyes, in the way his fingernails bit into his other hand, a drop of blood falling to the floor from his closed fist. And he knew because Ian had told him before what he thought in those moments, when he fell into the abyss; that it was like a black hole sucking him, something he'd never be able to ever escape. Mickey had been fucking terrified when Ian had whispered it into his shoulder, his voice shards of glass in his throat. That's when Mickey had packed him up, cradled him in his arms and had taken him to the hospital again.

Ian wouldn't move, frozen to the spot he had been standing in when Mickey got home to the mess that was their living room. He got up from the couch again and slowly approached Ian. When he was sure there wouldn't be anything forthcoming he slowly peeled Ian's fingers away from the table cloth and let it drop to the floor when no fingers were squeezing it anymore. Ian immediately balled the hand into a fist again, pricking his skin with his fingernails. Mickey let out a frustrated, pained sound. He took Ian's fists into his hands, letting his thumbs trace tenderly across them.

"Ian." Mickey's throat was dry, his voice clicking as he spoke. "Ian, please look at me."

Ian's eyes flicked to Mickey's face and guiltily away again.

"Come on, we can work this out. I just need you to look at me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ian was cooking and wanted to surprise Mickey for the special occasion and he wanted to propose but he burned the food and he hit something over on the table so shit spilled everywhere. 
> 
>  
> 
> _He couldn't take it anymore, rage coming through so he tore shit apart and that's when Mickey came home. Ian insulting Mickey telling him it's all his fault that he isn't in this for good, that he's just gonna leave, that he doesn't love him at all_


	4. Fairest of them all

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fairytales are only for children, aren't they?

"Don't tell him I told you but Mickey has always had a weakness for Disney princesses."

Ian looks at Mandy, completely perplexed.

"What?"

"Well, you know Mickey keeps giving you all these nicknames and he keeps picking all these Disney princesses because he knows them so well."

"Oh-kay?"

"I'm kinda surprised he hasn't called you Snow White yet."

"And why's that?"

"Because you're, you know", Mandy waves her hands around, gesturing at Ian's face, "the fairest of them all."

Ian sputters, ends up choking on a sip of water, coughing up his lungs. Thankfully not literally.

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't want to have them sitting around on my laptop so here you go.


End file.
